One of my boss back in the days when I was still working for a service organization once said that twenty friends cannot play together for twenty years. I have written about this somewhere, I can’t remember now but it clearly has a lot of impact on this topic today. Yes, I dsicovered the reason where a number of my close friends that I grew up with are no longer anywhere to be seen. Not that they can’t be found but everyone seems to be busy even though some are busy doing nothing or just forming busy. The truth is twenty years is such a long time to be rolling with the same set of people (Twenty friends), for example.
While I was growing up with my close circle back then, I knew the type of discussion we used to have. The kind of topics we dwelled on and the kinds of things we do. Our thoughts, yes, we reasoned like kids. No ambitions, no business plans, no goals or plans for the future. We felt like when the time is right things will automatically take shape. How naive we were back then to thing the world was merciful. We didn’t realise how harsh the environment was and how difficult survival would become as time passes.
Yes, as time passed we started realising that things were not really as we had anticipated. For example, when I was in secondary school, life was all but cool, the moment I graduated from secondary school I realised there was two sides to every coin. I saw myself in a complete different world that knows no mercy and takes no shit. That was the period our life started adjusting to the reality before us. Yes, our discussion started shifting to how we can get jobs to earn. Some of us had lost some of our parents then so we had no choice than to start working to survive.
The life we met was not a palatable one at all and guess what, we started wishing we could turn back the hands of time and go back to the days when we were little, doing our normal childish things. Unfortunately for us life does not happen like that, life does not go backwards, it keeps moving forward as time continues to tick whether or not you are making good use of it and making an impact. As we grew even older things kept changing because the world around us was changing with speed.
Some of us had started moving to other states, going separate ways, searching for daily bread. Some are married with families, some have their business and some are working for multinational organizations. This is just life. Obviously, everyone’s grown now and as expected the kind of conversation that everyone should be having should be about business, money, entrepreneurship, etc and other rewarding conversations. It will be unfortunate that you meet your circle of friends from way back and all you end up discussing are things that happened twenty years ago. Don’t you think that you all are still living in the past?
That’s what it is, you can’t keep visiting the past and expect the future to be kind to you. If you are not comfortable having money or business conversation with your friends and close circles, then I guess it is time for you to make yourself some new friends. As I grew in life I realised that the essence of friends is for business growth and business partnerships. If not business what else am I supposed to be discussing with you as a man who’s got a family to run. Discussing any other thing asides business is wasting precious time with you and we both know that in this world, the good use of time is money.
A friend (i wont mention his name) called me recently that he wants to use my car to attend an important meeting. Unfortunately, I told him. the the car had been sold due to some business investment that needed some instant capital. I sensed the sadness in the tone of his voice even though I told him the essence was for business pursuit. The sadness in the tone of his voice I later realised in the course of our conversation was the fact that he had no friends that could come to his aid immediately at the point of need and he ended the conversation with, honestly I need to make some new friends.
I truly understand the importance of keeping your friends but I have clearly changed majority of them to business friends due to the kind of conversation I have with them whenever we meet. It has to be business or there is nothing to talk about. Yes you can call me whatever you want. I don’t need to remind you that I love money so much. I love money. I have a family to take care of so if I don’t love money enough to make money who will feed my family and pay the bills for me?
This is why I disengaged with the lots who do not have anything to offer. Some people are just there to drain your energy with the kinds of interest they have. They don’t discuss business or how to make money. They have no plans for the future. They focus mainly in the now. Tell me, if you dwell with such kind of people won’t you become exactly like them. The say if you associate yourself with five billionaires you will eventually become the sixth billionaire. The kind of friends you keep will either make or destroy you. Why do you think that some men, once they get married, they reduce the amount of time they spend with friends? This is because they understand the kind of influence friendship brings. Even their wives will be curious to know the kinds of friends their husbands keep and how to channel it to their benefits for growth and sustenance.
If you are in a circle or friendship that do not bring in any reward to you or you are not comfortable discussing how to make money, open businesses, create employment, be innovative, achieve success and above all make money while improving yourself and learning some considerable skills from, then it is about time you made yourself some new friends. Change your curcle immediately for your own sake.